| (no subject) |
[May. 8th, 2009|09:12 am] |
I took my hot water bottle to school yesterday. It was good.
Joy for small pleasures. |
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| string theory |
[May. 6th, 2009|12:20 am] |
So I used to have a theory about the cosmic fishing line. I used to think that there were people in the world who were tied together by cosmic fishing line. Even before they met in life. So at any point in their lives that they crossed paths the fishing line was there and beckoning them together. That any problem between them could be sorted out because the line held them together.
Then I realised this isn't the case, it's too close to the idea of fate or destiny for my logical, pragmatic mind and I substituted it for a theory in which a romantic relationship between any two people can be sustained with enough selfless commitment. Relationships are nothing more than the sum of both person's actions. I think most people would find this a bit unsexy but I have a fondness for it.
Tonight my Dad told me his theory which turns out to be a nice amalgamation of both. I'll call it the tiny thread theory. He says: Sometimes you feel a tiny thread pulling you towards someone and when they're away you feel sad because there's no one at the end of your thread and then they come back and you feel better that they're around. From there the way you act towards each other can protect the thread, support it and strengthen it or conversely fray, weaken or cut the thread. That the thread's size and strength is mutable was a revelation to me.
So for the moment I think I will subscribe to this last one. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 2nd, 2009|12:09 am] |
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When did I become a shit person? |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 25th, 2009|11:24 am] |
Speaking of unhealthy relationships... I am ending my unhealthy obsession with keeping EVERYTHING. Amongst the usual clutter of a pack rat such a train tickets, movie tickets, millions of scraps of paper with 'important' things scrawled illegibly on them, I found more ridiculous things- I had lovingly kept a receipt for a $5 meal at the lansdowne a year ago, little tubs of paint i had mixed up for an artwork in year 12 (7 years ago!!) and no doubt I will continue to find many such useless things.
But from this day forth I will not let these things clutter my life anymore. I will throw out train tickets, movie tickets and receipts for pub meals GUILT FREE!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 2nd, 2009|10:25 pm] |
Do you know what cheers me up when I am glum??
ME.
I can be so cute sometimes. When I read my jounral back I find all these unexpectedly cute entries with poems and funny pictures that I don't remember drawing. |
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| Life is better in my subconcious |
[Mar. 25th, 2009|06:56 pm] |
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Somehow in the few moments sleep I got last night I had a dream that i had stumbled upon an old film I had made when I was younger and when I rewatched it I realised it was genius and somehow I had forgotten all about it. It was feature length and very clever and involved a bunny and I was so proud of it I wanted to show everyone. Oh i wish I couldd remember more so i couldd film it and then have a clever feature length film about a bunny to my name that I could be proud of. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 24th, 2009|09:00 am] |
I feel like inside my head I'm making progress but the outside world just keeps getting more messy so I can't keep up. When other people aren't involved I know just whats going on but people complicate things so terribly.
A hour out of sydney felt so far removed. Sitting on a rock at Umina without a phone and no one knowing where I was felt like I might as well have been on another planet. Just think- for an hour or more no one could contact me. Ooooh. I hummed to myself and looked at my legs and thought about how the feeling of being at the beech is even nicer than the view.
I put nail polish on a week ago but I don't have any nail polish remover. When I'm anxious I pick at it (a lot recently) but then I have to repaint the missing bits because I can't remove the remaining bits. Cyclic.
Speaking of which I'm going to cycle tomorrow. With my new rear view mirror. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 9th, 2009|08:57 am] |
Given the last few days, tonight I found myself feeling particularly feeling self constructive. Unprepared, I dashed out into the night.
I wandered the dark streets purposefully. Before long I found myself perched precariously on the edge of the highest bench I could find. I looked out over the city and thought about all the people who didn’t even know I was there- who didn’t care. I thought about the loneliness, about how wonderful it felt... to be the only person in the park.
The wind rushed at my face making me teeter on the edge. The rain hit me softly like the spray from a ferry.... or a million tiny kisses. Finally when I had done all I could I took a deep breath and jumped... onto the grass. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 13th, 2008|08:00 am] |
Rainy rainy friday night.
I was thinking today how I'm two thirds of the way to the trifecta: good work life, home life and love life. But I'm still exhasted. Maybe thats what it means to have a good life to be exhasted all the time. No that doesn't sound right. I suspect I have beeen over doing it with the work and over doing it with the analysing of the less than ideal love life hence I am both physically and emotionally tired. This weekend is sort of like a mini holiday, more like two miniscule holidays. But I don't think craming two miniscule holidays into a weekend is going to result in rest and relaxation. At the very least I am hoping it will result in an excuse to use my new swimmers. Please get to the 30 degrees.
Yes so I am working quite a lot this coming week because I used my time slightly ineffectually this past week. (Read: pining like a alaskan forrest) So lets hope I finish off these jobs so I can actually relax over christmas. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 9th, 2008|06:18 am] |
A while back I lamented the lack of sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll in my life. Today I realised with a a little tweaking a couple of substitutions a similar effect can be achieved.
For sex I substituted a brisk stroll in the park, for rock 'n' roll I substituted my ipod of songs with melancholy leanings and in place of drugs I used fresh air and a bit of sunshine. If you don't think about it too much you almost can't tell the difference! |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 4th, 2008|06:38 pm] |
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Is anyone going to peats ridge festival this year? |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 2nd, 2008|10:54 pm] |
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Oh Shit. I am so stalkable. How do I fix this?!!? |
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| Tis the season... |
[Dec. 1st, 2008|08:24 am] |
Tonight my house put up it's christmas tree. We got the tree from Tempe Tip. At $8 it was a bargain and when we opened itt it turned out the previous owners had left all there christmas ornaments in the box so we scored some frilly tinels things, a string of beads and a bag of candy canes. Real edible candy canes had been used as decoration, carefully packed away into a zip lock g, tucked in beside the christmas tree. Then some time later the christmas tree was made redundant, left in the nearest salvos bin and before you knwo it the tree is standing in our living room, bedecked in those very same candy canes it had worn a least a year before.
Vanessa Berry would be proud. |
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| Thought that it would rain on a day like today... |
[Nov. 30th, 2008|02:11 am] |
I feel just an itty bit invincible right now.
Despite the rain and a barely any sleep I got up and did the market stall. Doing a market stalls seemed to one of those thinsg I was forever planning but never quite did so I feel like I should be crossing something off a list except I never pup market stall on any of my lists. *Considered writting a new list containing 'have a market stall' at the top just so as to cross it off*
Anyway, despite the rain and the sun nothing went wrong. If fact it all went great. Opperation have a nice time people watching, catching up with old friends, making new ones and selling a few cclothes on the side all went well.
Mission Acomplished. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 28th, 2008|10:25 am] |
This morning I set off on an expedition. Inspired by Vanessa Berry, I went in search of new adventures of the second hand variety. I picked a bunch of op shops from the white pages that were in more or less the same direction, grabbed my street directory and headed off. I tried to pick ones I hadn't been to before or seldom went to and that were in the outer suburbs where the old op shop charm of my youth might still linger. But alas they had all been done up and cleaned out and very few really old or truely bizarre items were left.
At the risk of a making a 'back in my day' sort of rant op shops aren't what they used to be. Or perhaps my ability to be amused by other people's junk is waning. None the less I got a few useful things and managed to avoid handing over my precious money for the glossey coffee table book on the history of Hollywood, the David Jones' homeware calalogue from 1973 or the old lady frock with big shoulder pads. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 17th, 2008|09:09 am] |
You can export Facebook events into iCal. Yipeee.
That is all. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 11th, 2008|10:19 am] |
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I had a pretty day that involved some enjoyment of the sun and some being impressed by the expansivness of the sky and some other thoughts that I had planned to share with the world but then I came home and hung out with my housemates until all the thoughts were replaced with a happy tiredness. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|09:50 am] |
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Why is it more fun to think about the past or the future than live in the present? |
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